How many times have you heard someone say, “I wanted to do something but something else got in my way?” A lot, I would imagine. I know I have.
You see the most pernicious lie that people tell themselves is that they have no control over their lives. They are passive bystanders to whom life happens.
This is a limiting belief and the enormity of it is frightening. If you truly believe you have no control over life, that it is nothing but a fairground ride for which you have a ticket, then you will have no control (or very little control) over what happens to you.
Breaking This Mindset
This mindset needs breaking. Outside of the unfortunates trapped in modern slavery or incredible poverty, we are in the most fortunate period in history.
You have endless choices. You have the ability to be anything or do anything. This is because of the incredible abundance of the technological era. While there is still disease, it is by and large controlled and remote for most of our lives.
There is unlimited education available and much of it for free (or at a very low cost) and the Internet has meant that even the most financially challenged of souls can start their own business and become their own boss and, as importantly, develop their financial freedom.
So, the only thing standing in your way is you.
It’s Not As Hard As You Might Think
The easiest way to stop believing a lie is to confront that lie. To keep repeating the truth until it takes the place of the lie that has developed its own pathways in the brain.
We know, in our hearts, that we make our own choices. You don’t have to sit in watching TV tonight, you could be starting a business.
You don’t have to go to college to study medicine to please your parents, if you want to – you can study fashion just like you always wanted.
So, we need a mantra.
You can choose your own but the essence is this: “I am in control of my life. I will make decisions that benefit me. I will not apologize for this but will continue to act with caring, compassion and kindness to others even if they do not support my decisions.”
By repeating your mantra (rephrase the one above or create your own) on a regular basis, it will become a “script” in your brain. The next time you find yourself making a decision to please someone else, rather than to please yourself – review your mantra, then and there on the spot.
Then, accept the blessing you have been given in life. Make your choice. Accept that choice in your soul as the one that you want. Then own the responsibility for your choice. The good and the bad. There is no perfect decision in life, but you can live life on your terms. In my experience that makes people happier and more successful in all walks of life.